As a teacher, the summer months are a time to recover and reevaluate. This year, though, as I get ready to change schools after seven years, that reflection is a little more focused. I’m incredibly excited to begin teaching high school, but that excitement is felt right alongside my sadness to leave my current school.
In reality, this seems to be a pretty common thing in my life when facing a big change. It seems like a contradiction, at first. The sadness should reduce the excitement, right? Or maybe the other way around? No, the two aren’t really in conflict. The thing that I’ve started to notice is that the sadness and excitement are, at their core, coming from the same place, a place of gratitude.
The sadness is coming from realizing that, over these past seven years, I have been tremendously blessed. The people I’ve worked with, the students I’ve taught, the things I’ve learned, they’ve all been incredible. When I think about the great memories I’ve made, there is definitely going to be a level of sadness at the realization that those things are coming to an end, but it is, weirdly, a happy sadness. I’m aware that many people do not have as a positive an experience at their first school as I have had, and I’m not leaving that gratitude behind, it’s coming with me.
The excitement I feel is because of how grateful I am for the opportunities that are coming. I’m not sure what it’s going to be like, obviously, but I’m confident that the God who has blessed me every day of my life so far, is going to continue to in the future as well. The blessings in the past, I’ll miss with gratitude. The blessings in the future, I’ll anticipate with gratitude. In the now, what can I be except in awe at the generosity of God in His dealings with me?